catiecate's Journal

1:05am: Now that I have a computer at home I've decided... LJ is a lot like having sex with your friends's boyfriend. It's a lot more fun when you're being sneaky about it (like at work).

11:38pm: He sings... my life
v. A little light looks through her bedroom window.
She dances and I dream, she's not so far as she seems,
Of brighter meadows, melting sunsets,
Her hair blowing in the breeze.
And she can't see me watching.
And I'm thinking love...
Chorus:
It's bittersweet, more sweet than bitter, Bitter than sweet.
It's a bittersweet surrender.
v. I'm older now.
I work in the city.
We live together.. But it's different from my dream.
Morning light fills the room. I rise.
She pretends she's sleeping.
Are we everything we wanted?
And i'm thinking love...
Chorus:
I know we don't talk about it.
We don't tell each other.
All the little things that we need.
We work our way around each other.
As we tremble and we bleed.
Chorus

3:49pm: Last five CD's I listened to:
1- Tori Amos, "Scarlet's Walk"
2- Violent Femmes, "Add it up... The Best Of"
3- Harvey Danger, "Where have all the merrymakers gone?"
4- N'Sync, "No Strings Attached"
5- Dashboard Confessional, "Places you've come to..."

Five bands/artists I consider to be my little secret (I love them, but they're not that popular):
1- The Devlins
2- Big Head Todd and the Monsters
3- Chantal Kreviaux
4- Placebo
5- Deathcab for Cutie

Five songs that I'll never get sick of:
1- "Circle" by Big Head Todd and the Monsters
2- "Aenima" by TOOL
3- "Brilliant Dance", by Dashboard
4- "Mudshuvel" by Staind
5- "A Sorta Fairytale" by Tori

Five songs I never thought I'd get sick of...but I did:
1- "Sex and Candy" Marcy Playground
2- "Angie" Rolling Stones (damn the classic rock station at work)
3- "I will survive" Gloria Gaynor (Too many female friends with breakups this past year)
4- "1000 Miles" by Vanessa Carolton
5- "Bye Bye Bye" N'Sync

Five songs that remind me of a past or current love:
1- "Crush" by DMB (Mike)
2- "Brian Wilson" by Barenaked Ladies (Adam)
3- "My Heart will go on" Celine Dion (David)
4- "Comfortably Numb" Pink Floyd (Brent)
5- "You are so beautiful" Joe Cocker (Sean)

Five songs that put me in a silly mood:
1- "She don't use jelly" Flaming Lips
2- "American Music" Violent Femmes
3- "Copa Cabana" Barry Mannilow
4- "Detachable Penis" King Missle
5- "Pencil Thin Mustache" Jimmy Buffett

Five artists whose CD's you'd be surprised to know I own:
1- ABBA
2- Barry Manilow
3- Garth Brooks
4- Melissa Etheridge
5- Gloria Estefan

Five artists everyone seems to love, except me:
1- DMB
2- Linkin Park
3- Grateful Dead
4- Norah Jones
5- Creed

Five songs that remind me of high school:
1- "Istanbul... not Constantinople" They Might be Giants
2- "Here comes your man" Pixies
3- "The Joker" Steve Miller Band
4- "The End of the World as we know it" REM
5- "What's Up", Four Non-Blondes

11:58am: Why did my "friends of" list jump to 40 people when no one has added me and there are still 34 listed??

1:52pm:

5:58pm: Ok, so I've done it.
From here on out, this LJ will be Friends-Only.

And let me tell you after trying to go back through two years of LJ entries and change them to Friends-Only, you need top secret security clearance and a urine sample to get on through.

Seiously, add me... chances are I'll add you back. Or just leave a comment here.

3:23pm: Geez, like that wasn't obvious
Which "Friend" Are You?




Catie, you've got a little bit of Phoebe going on!

Um, ok! You're, like Phoebe. Ok, so you may not have Phoebe's, well, special intuition or, um, musical talent. But, like everyone's favorite beautiful-blond-psychic-masseuse, you never lie and your friends are the most important thing in your life. Read more about your inner "Friend"?

3:05pm: So, it?s been a while since I?ve updated. What?s my deal?!

Anyway, what?s new with the life of Catie? Let me think?

I dunno. I?ve felt so awesome for the past few weeks. Just? very content and centered or something. It?s been a good thing, to say the least. Things with Mike are going very well. We?re at a good place right now. And I think it?s because I am in a good place right now. The psycho-clingy-freaking out if I don?t have myself chained to your ankle at all moments-Catie is on her way out. And because of that I think Mike has been a little more at ease with me.

I did one of my favorite clearing exercises last night and I think it was a great idea.

I had written Mike a letter a few weeks ago. An angry, ranting letter. Probably about 6 or 7 pages explaining to him what an ass he is and how muc hI hate him for all the horrible things he?s done, down to the one time he was 15 minutes late when we were supposed to go out like 8 months ago. I mean, like totally picking him apart. I never gave it to him obviously.

Last night, I reread it, and set it on fire and threw it away. Good bye letter, good bye all the negative emotions I felt in that letter. It made me feel good to do that.

Now if I could burn my employment agreement, life would be perfect.

Work sucks. I hate it. I am utterly unproductive. Everyone around me is utterly unproductive. I am here, getting a paycheck. That?s all. But my commissions ar e down and that ain?t good.

I really want to find a new job. Reeeealllllyyy, reallllllyyyy bad.

3:14pm: I hate lazy bartenders
I am such a bitch. Mike and Ken had me make up a "to do" list for hte bartenders. He he... they're gonna hate me, those lazy bastards!!!!




DAILY BAR MAINTENANCE CHECKLIST


I. DAY BAR (The following should be done daily before shift change):

 All straw boxes must be restocked, as well as making sure there are back-ups in the drawers of matches, cocktail napkins, stirrers, and straws.

 Restock silverware, place mats, and napkins.

 Any empty liquor bottles should be restocked.

 Enough fruit should be cut for that particular night.

 Juices should be topped off; make sure there is milk in the cooler.

 Garbage should be emptied and the cans rinsed out.

 Any full boxes of empty bottles should be removed from the bar area, sorted, and put downstairs.

 Periodically, the beer trap needs to be wiped out and the plastic run under hot water. This is one area that attracts fruit flies and starts to SMELL badly!

 During ?downtime?, any routine bar maintenance should be completed. (See Part III.)



II. EVERY NIGHT AT CLOSING:

 Both wells need to be cleaned at the end of EVERY night, especially since they are located so close to the soda guns and tend to collect run-off from the hoses.

 The beer trap should be cleaned and the plastic should be run through dish after last beer has been poured.

 All fruit should be flipped into new containers and the tray should be run through dish.

 All straw boxes must be restocked, as well as making sure there are backups in the drawers of cocktail napkins, stirrers, and straws both at shift change.

 All stainless must be wiped down at closing, including the tops of the reach-ins (where the ketchup and shot glasses, etc., are stored).

 All tins and strainers should be run through dish nightly.

 Silverware, plates, ashtrays should be restocked nightly and at shift change.

 All three sinks should be scrubbed clean and DRIED.

 Soda guns should be soaked in hot water over night.

 The ledge along the Megatouch game should be wiped down thoroughly, along with the bar top beofre putting up the stools.

 Remove empty bottles and garbage.

 The popcorn machine MUST be cleaned out every night, with no exceptions. The bowls must be run through dish. If there is a container of oil or popcorn kernels left, they should be covered. If the containers are empty, run them through dish.



III. WHEN TIME ALLOWS?

 Bottles should be wiped daily.

 Glass area should be organized. Periodically, the mesh must be run through dish and the shelves wiped.

 The gaskets around the sliding doors to the beer reach-in should be wiped clean.

 Juice containers should be run through dish periodically.

 Sugar caddies, salt, and peppers should be filled.

 General straightening?especially by the register and the shelves near the phone needs to be done.

 Mirrors should be wiped down.

 Make sure the Snapple cooler is clean? (make sure that nothing is spilled or broken inside? clean the glass door).

2:28pm: So anyway, I went to see my boyfriend?s new apartment last night? it?s pretty fabulous? an old refurbished warehouse with 18-foot ceilings and these huge windows? it was awesome. Although the not so awesome part came when I fell off the windowsill but that?s later on in the entry!

Went out for happy hour with Joy right after work yesterday. So three glasses of red wine later, I?m all sappy? met Mike at the old apartment on Elm Street and waited for him.. When he walked in I was all teary-eyed sitting on his kitchen counter smoking a cigarette. We went to his new place? which like I said was quite cool, and then we went to dinner. There is NOTHING in Wallingford, ugh, so we went to Louie?s Pizza? go figure. I mean, we DID go to Mike?s restaurant but the fool he has working for him shut the kitchen down like 2 hours early? grrrrrr?.

So then we go back to his place and all I wanted to do was for us to sit in the huge window and talk? when I lived in Boston there was nothing more comforting for me when I was homesick than to sit in my window sill and just watch Boston happen. It was a great idea? until we got up there and got into the conversation? and Mike accidentally knocked my cigarette out of my hand? and I say, ?I?ll get it!?? not realizing that it?s like a 3 foot drop to the floor and I fell DOWN and right into the chair, and bruised all of my ribs on the left side.

It was certainly a funny fall?. But painful. Shit, I?m always willing to act like an ass for a laugh! Mike was scared at first and then he just laughed his ass off? he woke me up this morning laughing at me. Ha ha. Very funny. It?s all fun and games until someone punctures a lung.
I told him he'd be hearing from my lawyer.

Note to self: IT'S A FAR DROP FROM THE WINDOW SILL TO THE FLOOR.

Extra Note to Self: Sex with bruised ribs isn't all that much fun either.

I'm going to get my hair cut and highlighted. Why the hell not, ya know?

10:49am: Excess Baggage

Well I know the words, but I can't really speak them
To you

And I hide all the pain that I've gained with my wisdom
From you

And I'm eaten alive by what I hold inside
All the things that I live with I can't easily hide
And I'm left here with nothing, nothing to live for
But you

It?s not easy to hide
All this damage inside
I'll carry you with me
Until I'm not alive

When you look at my face, does it seem just as ugly?
To you?

I can't seem to erase all the scars I have lived with
From you

I'm so sick of this place
This taste in my mouth
Cause of you I can't figure what I'm all about
And I'm left here with nothing, nothing to live for
But you

It?s not easy to hide
All this damage inside
I'll carry you with me
?Til I'm not alive